Well, little was I to know that there was a third option that I needed on that list: 3) don't be Mr. TooMuchToSayTooSlowly. Further, that being unthought, this thought also got unthought: 3 results in 1.
But let's begin at the beginning, with pics mostly coming from Wil Himself (the ending is shocking and horrifying, or so).
I got to the Moore theatre late - around 7:30. As I got out of my car, an "honest looking" fellow came over to me and offered me a parking ticket in a way I couldn't seem to refuse. He was charging the same $10 that the machine was so I didn't figure that was so bad but when I realized I only had $20s, I decided to test the waters, and asked if he had change, to which he immediately started with "I'll get my guy at my other lot to give you...;" I saw the fins in the water and tapped him on the shoulder and told him that I was already late and he could keep the change. I left glancing over my shoulder at my car hoping that it wasn't for the last time.
I got to my seat just as Molly Lewis was coming on, so I figured I hadn't missed much Wil, for which I was glad. She was grand, as she made up and forgot lyrics on the spot - that was so brave to try out a song that really actually wasn't finished - I kind want to have her baby now (and I'm a guy, which would make it much more challenging!).
Then there was Wil. Huge applause. I went ahead and began recording it on my iPhone. He started in with a story from Happiest Days of Our Lives - the one about the Rocky Horror Picture Show. He was clearly "on" as he pwn'd some newb who spoilerfailed about the location of the show in the story. Five minutes into it my sister phones and then texts to remind me it's Mothers' Day on Sunday, but I don't answer either, then, just for fun I check to see what it did to my recording... it stoppped it - shit. I restarted and got the rest of the reading which was well accompanied by Paul and Storm, though I think that they had more and sexier bits to work with in w00tst0ck 1.0. Regardless, it was awesome!
At which point MC Frontalot came on and would have killed but it seems many people (including myself) were unaware of the lyrics (and his rapping was too quick to pick many of them up otherwise). Nevertheless he was still lauded, and I gave him props for being the front-man at intermission and after the show at their counter selling their stuff to their adoring fans.
Then there was Hank Green - a really normal name for a rather extraordinary talent. He had a great tune about quarks and a ST:tNG song which he was tickled to be singing with Ensign Wesley Crusher (as it were) staring him down from the wings.
Stephen “Stepto” Toulouse was ominous. Cool, but you could tell, you wouldn't want to be Mr. p00nhun+er when he was on the job. Additionally, he had a very neat presentation, and though he broke into near-giggles a couple of times he held it together very well.
James Ernest and Mike Selinker were very clever and clearly worked very well together. They reminded me of Penn and Teller, as far as chemistry goes.
Jason Finn, who filled in with his drumming when required, reminded me a ton of Tommy Chong - sometimes unintentionally funny (like when he took a swig of wine) - but really off-beat and in his own world in a good way.
Then there was Mr. Adam Savage, who got one of the biggest applauses of the night. He was funny, and he had some Mythbusters advanced screening stuff - that was way bitchin'. He went on for quite some time according to my recording, but the time flew by.
Penultimately Paul and Storm came out and were frakin' hilarious - Nugget Man - classic! They made me pee a little. Just a little. They must be killer to drink with. Since I've been throwing around some comparisons I'll say these guys are the modern day Smothers Brothers.
Ultimately the Pirate song (The Captain's Wife's Lament) ... not much makes me laugh 'till I cry anymore, but this did it. If you weren't going to go for any other reason, you'd kick yourself for missing this. This is audience participation at its best. Aaaarrrrrr!
And that was it. But that's not what I've come to blog about. I've come to blog about karma. Remember karma? I mention it in the title.
So I buy a w00tshirt and get the complimentary (!) w00tposter, and get in line for the Paul, Storm, Savage, Wheaton line. It's really long. But I suck it up, because I know that it'll give me plenty of time to plan what I'm going to say. Now, I'm a teacher by trade, so I often find myself with moments in which I must say intelligent things off the top of my head, so I figure I'm good to go.
Not so. Apparently a mind given too much time is as failworthy as hands made idle. So I think about hockey because I've given up this night when the Canucks play a very important Game 4, for which I was wearing my Canucks jersey. I think about all the books/movies/tv shows/blogs/podcasts/interviews I've seen Wil associated with and think of comments for each. I think about snappy things to say about this night's performance. I think of clever things to say in general. I consider asking Wil to record a Mothers' Day message for my wife, but worry that it'd take too much time. I consider asking will to not only sign my copy of Dancing Barefoot and the w00tposter, but my iPhone's copy of Just a Geek (there's an app for that ;) ), though decide that would also be too much. I think about the "hand shake" knowing that Wil doesn't like to - even though I've seen him do it already to a couple of people ahead of me - but I doubt I'll try it.
I see him totally nerdsquee about a female fan wearing a shirt that clearly means something to him (angel wings on the back?), and am happy for her. It was probably way more reaction that she thought she'd get. I even get a good pic of it.
Amid all this I take a couple random pics here and there and a couple as I near the table. I'm AT the table! I say hi and thanks to Paul and Storm telling them I did in fact pee a little. I tell Adam that he's like the only reason I still watch tv (Wil and hockey are the others), and then I am before...
Wil Wheaton. Crap. It's really him. Right there. He looks up from his signing, says good bye to the people in front of me, sees my jersey and mutters, "Ah... you're one of those suporters, huh?" Yes! Hockey talk! "Yup" I say extremely wittily. He teases, "So how are the 'Hawks" treating you?" I had just found out that the Canucks had lost bad, and were now down 3-1, but I didn't allow my disappointment to show, instead came back with, "Is that all you got?" to which he says, "Yeah, pretty much," as he signs the w00tposter. Yes! That was sweet!
Now You're thinking, sign book, take pic, "thanks" - and walk away, right? That's how it should have happened. But no, He gets up, mentions something about the Kings upcoming prospects, specifically mentions a prospect goalie and a d-man by name (which I blank on). Now at this point he's clearly thinking: "Hand-off the camera and have the pic then, dude," but I have no clue and besides, here I'm talking hockey with Wil Wheaton which is the closest I'm going to get to talking hockey with Wayne Gretzky (coolness factor) so I say something like "Yeah, the Kings look good for the future, they'll win a cup then the Canucks can win the next year."
Noticing that I'm not going to hand-off the camera, he sits back down, I pass him my book. (Sigh.) Then I look at Wil and ask for a pic, which he graciously accepts, turn to the young lady behind me and I ask her to take the pic to which she replies, "No problem, as long as you do the same for me." (<---- note this) "Sure," I mutter, as I hand her the camera.
She takes a VERY good pic. Then my mind blanks for a moment I get Wil's attention one last time as I'm backing up (very nearly into the stand behind me). "Oh, and thanks for everything! Keep doing what you're doing; it means a lot to a lot of people." He looks somewhat surprised at the last minute sentiment and responds with, "Thank you. That means a lot to me."
At which point I nearly black out, turn around, avoid the stand, and stumble out the door.
I think of my car. Then I /facepalm -- the young lady who took my pic... damn! I'm such a dick! Then I think about how long I must have been in front of Wil, and go through the whole scene and think, I'm such a dick!
But there's nothing I can do, as I can't get back in, but walk away like said dick.
So, now that I have this opportunity, I apologize to the fine lady who took the pic, who didn't get the promised one herself, and had to stand behind Mr. TooMuchToSayTooSlowly.
So what do I get for my dickishness? Well, my car's still there and in the same condition I left it in. w00tthat!
But I get home, on Sunday, only to find that while the iPhone audio was there, ALL the pics and vid I took at the show (and a few from Sunday) are GONE. My pic with Wil, and the pic of him nerdsqueeing, and the others, all gone.
I had Picasa erase all the uploaded ones from my camera card, which I do by default, so I tried a Glary Undelete which only found the pics that had been uploaded. It was as if I deleted them from the camera myself or never took them at all.
I knew they were there because I looked at them when I got in my car, and I showed my wife the pic with Wil when I got back to the Hotel. I'll try a "professional" I suppose, but I'll be shocked if I ever see them again. But that's what I get for being a dick.
Regardless, I am thrilled I got to see an awesome show, and got to meet and chat with one of the few "public" people I truly admire as a person.